The journey of discovering our true Self is the pilgrimage where we can gather wisdom, love and ultimate happiness of spirit. Life is a combination of joy and sorrow. Joy always makes us feel like that “I’m the top of the world or the world exists for me only”. Whereas pain always leaves us alone. It’s like that “I’m nothing in this world or I’m alone in this big world.” Pain distracts us from the rest of the world. And we have a natural tendency to avoid this aloneness and to escape from the pain. But, pain can be our greatest ally, if we accept it and enter inside it. There was a nice saying of the great philosopher, Rumi, “Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life’s search for love and wisdom.” Pain opens the path of self-discovery. We can only discover our true Self when we really learn to see ourselves in the darkness of pain.
The aloneness of pain always comes as a boon. It’s because we can only think, truly, about ourselves or see our activities in various life events as an audience when we stay alone from the rest of the world. The time when we can do that we discover our true Self or true guide or true friend. The foremost step in discovering our Self is dissolving our ego. The Pain hits that point and we feel sad for that. If we allow the pain to do its job, it will break the hard wall of ego or false Self and discover our True Self.
My journey towards the Self:
Life throws us many challenges in the different phases of our lives. The challenges are the opportunity to realize our Self. I’m not an exceptional from that. From my very young years, I always searched for a man who will be my friend, philosopher, and guide. A father is the first man in every girl’s life. Hence, I often tried to see my hero in my Dad. But, I was not so satisfied with his performance since he scolded me a lot. Lol. But, that scolding didn’t last for long. He passed away when I was twenty, only. That was the second time, I was traumatized by an incident after overcoming or avoiding my first trauma of my first breakup.
But, I hated trauma. I hated to cry. I always kept me busy with my friends. I passed my nights by chatting over the internet to forget the grief. That time someone came into my life as a blessing. He spread his happiness over a stagnant pool of my life me like a bag full of fragrant wildflowers. His love made me feel that I’m the out of the world. Light and shade is the rule of life. One fine morning, he went from my life and left me alone again. I lost my best friend, my guide, and my man. I was traumatized again and this time it reaches its worst. I took sleeping pills and anti-depressant to blank the heartache.
The journey within the pain:
Life had been going on and I had been missing one after one opportunity of Self-discovery. The last opportunity I found when I was the victim of an unhealthy marriage. That time, the questions bothered me so much were, “Why me and why am I alive, still?” I gained some courage to look inside the pain in search of those unsolved questions of life. That was not easy for me. I remembered the events one after one and visualized my activities, responses and thoughts during the respective incidents. When I pictured the thoughts in my mind like a live video in various incidents of life, I realized it was me, who was responsible for all. It was me, who committed mistakes one after one and blamed others for all. This body and this mind lead to all mistakes. And I’m still alive after all the misdeeds and mistakes. Isn’t that a miracle? I realized that someone is there in my life who saves me in my every struggle, in every danger and in every mistake. And the mistakes were not the mistakes, anymore. Those all guided me to the true path self-discovery. He protects me from doing any misdeeds. He is the one, who loves me, who saves me throughout the life. He is not a man or woman who stays outside. He is the one who stays within me and within my heart. He is my friend, philosopher, and guide. He is my true Self. When I realized it, all fear has gone. I just believe, I’m sitting on my Lord’s chariot and I’m going wherever he leads me out. I’m just flowing with the stream of life.
Life is a journey which gives us the opportunity of Self-discovery. We can savor the total fun of life with its ups and down when we live the life with full of consciousness. Hope, this journey will help you to accept the pain and discover your true Self through the path of pain.The path of pain always leads to the river of happiness. It’s better to say that in Rum’s words,
“Don’t run away from grief, o’ soul
Look for the remedy inside the pain
because the rose came from the thorn
and the ruby came from a stone.”
In response to the Indispirie prompt: #Self-discovery