The beauty of nature is its uniqueness. Each thing of nature has its own beauty. We cannot compare the tranquillity of the river with the tidal waves of the ocean. Everything is beautiful at its own place. If one thinks why the jasmine flowers are not blooming like the big and colorful Dalia that will be his or her highest stupidity. We love Jasmine for its unique fragrance and white color. Dalia is so adorable to us for its unique types of colors. Nature is so creative that we can find uniqueness at everywhere. This uniqueness is their individuality.
In the same way, existence is so creative that it creates us, exclusively. Everybody has some distinct qualities for those he or she is beautiful at his or her own place. But, we don’t know to value this uniqueness. We always try to copy other by ignoring our individuality. We are torturing our soul by comparing us with others and forget our exclusiveness. This comparison always makes us unhappy. Suppose, someone thinks he is inferior to others, it will be the cause of his misery. On the other hand, if somebody thinks he is superior to anybody of his society, it will also bring misery to him. It is his ego, which thinks inferior or superior. And ego hurts.
When ego dissolves or when we stop comparing ourselves with others, individuality comes out. This is so beautiful that we can not stop ourselves from loving our own existence. When we begin to value our individuality, we can accept all our imperfections. Self-love starts from this acceptance.
We are exclusively unique at our own place. We don’t need to find out that uniqueness within ourselves. We just need to respect it. I am I, I cannot be you. In the same way, I cannot expect that you will be me or you will behave like me. We should value each other’s individuality. This is the only way to accept others as they are.
Jealousy starts from comparison and it is continuing as long as the comparison persists. The comparison is a virus that comes from the society from the days of childhood. The parents start to compare their children with others from the days of their first schooling and it continues until they find their boys or girls coming best at the standard of their society. We are the victim of comparison from our childhood. It sows the seed of jealousy from that very beginning of life. And Jealousy is like a disease that kills your beauty.It is an emotion that prevents you from accepting yourself as you are and to take others as they are. It is the fire that burns you from inside. And you cannot stop burning until you quit the habit of comparing yourself with others.
The comparison is totally baseless.Everyone is unique and incomparable. In nature, everything is beautiful because there is neither comparison nor the feeling of envy. Have you ever asked the Jasmine flower, why are you not colorful like the cosmos flower? Or to Mango tree, why are you not producing mango throughout the year like the Banana tree?
No, you definitely, don’t ask such silly questions like the idiots.Just like nature, every human is unique. Everyone has certain quality and capability. I may have the similarity with you, but I cannot be you. You are “you”, incomparable to anyone. You will bloom just like you, not like me. As much as you accept this truth you will never run to the rat race of the comparison and will be safe from the fire of jealousy.
You are comparing yourself by watching someone’s outside. You never know his inside. But you know your inside or your misery. Suppose, you are envious to see someone’s success or smiling face. You think how happy he or she is and how unhappy I am. No one knows How much pain I am carrying. From this comparison, the feeling of jealousy comes to your mind. That leads to negative thinking and tremendous hate towards somebody. And day by day, you are burnt by your self-creating fire of jealousy.
You cannot get out from your suffering until you have the feeling of envy. Stop comparing and respect your being and your uniqueness. Let you be bloom like the flowers. Then, you can appreciate other’s uniqueness. You’ll feel light and happy. Your jealousy will transform into compassion.
Life has no warranty period. Once it starts it can be ended at any moment without any prior notification. And living is the deal of full of insecurity and uncertainty. If you want security, you have to find it at your grave. Hence, living is an art of dancing at the edge of the leaf like the dew drops. Any moment the fall can be settle from the foliage. Thus, living is always at risk.
“Let your life lightly dance on the edges of Time like dew on the tip of a leaf.” –Rabindranath Tagore.
Being in the present is called Mindfulness. But, we hardly do that. We often feel concerned about the future, anticipate troubles and regretting about the past. This is the cause of all our suffering and agony. But, when we start mindful living, we can celebrate every pulse of life. There are 5 ways of living in the moment.
The Zen of Living: 5 ways to live in the moment:
Life is all about acceptance. We often waste our time, by questing life “Why Me” or by cursing our fate for all. We cannot control the things happens to us. But, we can control our reactions regarding the things happening to us. If the outcome is sorrow, don’t hesitate to cry a lot. If the things make you happy, don’t forget to share it. Sharing increases the happiness more. living doesn’t only mean pleasure or happiness. It is the combination of every emotion. So, take life as it is. This is the secret of living.
Be mindful in every Action:
Whatever you do, do it from your heart. Invest your full energy into that particular task. Try to do one task at one time. Then, you can concentrate on that task. If you have sex with a woman, concentrate on the sex with that woman. Don’t think about the other woman with whom you had spent the last night. Lol. Then, you can enjoy that the sex, totally.
We think too much about the future and the outcome of our actions and think less about the present. Thus, we always miss the present or the moment, which we are passing. We don’t have any time machine to see the future. In the same way, life has no rewind bottom to go back to the past. Thus , Living in the present is the only way of living. The Past is only insight. I’m not saying to forget the past. The past experiences help us to deal the present in a better way and to learn from the past mistakes. The future is only hopes. Not any statistical calculation. So, live in the present with the hope of tomorrow.
Conquer the fear of death:
Where there is life, there must be the death. But, we always think that we are immortal. That’s the cause of all our insecurities. We cannot calculate the ending time. But, at the time of death, we can count the moments, which we have enjoyed, truly. Death can happen at any moment. The moment, you are breathing, can be your last moment. So, enjoy every moment as the last moment of life. It works to kick out the fear of death.
We waste most of the time to think about others or by comparing us with others. But, we forget that any comparison needs a basic platform. We don’t have a basic platform. Everyone is unique and every person is going through the different situations. You can’t do the thing what I can because you are not me. Thus, the comparison has no value in life.
Another thing is we are often worried about what others think about us . We actually bothered about people’s opinion about us. If we would have been trying to know us, we didn’t require people’s view about ourselves. People only see what you show them. Hence, they cannot judge you.Be yourself and love yourself. That’s the way to know yourself, properly.We are not here to entertain others or to impress others. As much as you think about others’ view, you’ll miss precious moments of your life.
Living in the present is the secret of happiness. As much as you can live in the moment, you will spend a stress-free life. Stress is nothing but worrying about the future that is totally uncertain. So, celebrate each moment as it is the last moment of life and enjoy it totally, intensely and playfully. Life is like an ice-cream. Enjoy it before it melts.
Never think hard about the past. It brings tears.
Don’t think more about the future. It brings fear.
Jealousy is one of our self-created unpleasant emotions that arise from unhealthy comparisons between two or more people. Emotions mean an energy that comes to your mind to make you feel bad or good. So, if you transform the energy for a good purpose, you can feel well and can live a stress-free life also.
Jealousy is an emotion that restricts you to accept yourself as you are and to accept others as they are. In the prison of jealousy, you will live in an oxygen-less life. Jealousy not only harms you, but also ruins your relationships. Sometimes comparison inspires us. But comparison in a relationship just ruins it.
You can use the energy of jealousy for a better purpose if you can change some of your habits. These are the five habits that I mentioned in the title.
5 Habits that Transform Jealousy into Compassion:
Face the person:
Don’t try to escape from the person to whom you compare with yourself. Face him/her. Talk to him/her in a humble way though you may feel some hesitations in communication. Try to focus on the matter, which makes you feel jealous. It’s not easy. But if you do that, it can protect the relationship from breaking up. Avoiding the person or the matter only increases the risk of break up.
Appreciate the person:
Appreciating the person on his achievement, rather than maintaining the silence of jealousy. It increases your value to him. It maintains the closeness of the relationships. Suppose, you and your friend are preparing for a competitive examination. Your friend cracked it, but you couldn’t. Then a feeling of jealousy create a distance between you and your friend. Don’t let it increase. Go to your friend, appreciate him for his achievement and discuss the matter, how does he achieve that and why didn’t you crack that? It melts the ice of jealousy and creates the ground of compassion.
Praising the person:
You cannot imagine the magic of praising others, especially the persons to whom you feel jealous. I’m not saying about oiling or false praise for a selfish intention. Praise them on the matter that they deserve rather than making the suffocated environment of jealousy within you. Suppose, you are feeling jealous of your girlfriend or to your wife for her certain qualities. Whenever you face her you feel jealous of her. If you are not working on that, it will ruin your relationship. Just praise her from your heart for those qualities. Then watch the magic. You will be more special and more valuable to her. The direction of the wave of your relationship will be changed. Love and empathy will enrich your relationship. You can use praise in any relationship. It increases your value. Since everyone wants praise, but few of us can give it.
Showing interest in learning:
To cope up jealousy, you can also show your interest in learning on the matter of feeling jealous of the person. That means; you respect his /her qualities rather than comparing yourself to him/her. You can learn something from that person which can help you to reach that level or it may help you to know one’s struggle towards his achievements. Suppose, a girl has an average figure and she is not much bother about that. But, when she watches one of her average looking friends makes a slim and sexy figure, she starts to feel jealous of her. She can transform this jealousy to the compassion if she shows some interest in learning by asking her friend like that, “how could you get this awesome figure. Please give me some tips. I’ll also try that.” In this way either she can learn some tips from her friend or she can create a ground of compassion and love between their relationships.
Dissolving your Ego:
Your ego and your true self are completely different things. The true self is shielded by the ego. Happiness belongs to the true-Self. Ego is responsible for our unhappiness and external happiness. There is a saying of Albert Einstein that “More the knowledge, lesser the ego, lesser the knowledge, more the ego.” So, true knowledge can break the wall of ego. When ego dissolves, unhappiness cannot bother you. So, whenever you feel jealous of somebody, try to ignore your ego and accept his/her qualities or achievement in a positive way. Then you can understand comparison is totally baseless. Each person is unique and incomparable. You are just yourself not a dummy of another. Everyone is original. This feeling helps you to get rid of jealousy and other comparisons.
One can use these five habits at a time or any of these to transform jealousy into love and compassion. Jealousy is a very powerful emotion because by this emotion you can see the good qualities of others. But, when you compare those things to yours, you become disappointed and finally it snatches your happiness. So, transform this feeling into compassion and enjoy the happiness and a stress-free life.
Hello, everyone, my blog Close to you is nominated for 3 days quote challenge. This is the second time, my blog is nominated for this challenge. I gladly accept the challenge from my two fellow bloggers Salma and Liza.
Salma, the author of the blog Salmamia: Salma is a very inspirational writer and a photographer also. I love her blog for her positive views on life and love for nature. Her smooth and thoughtful attract the mind of readers.
Liza, the author of the blog lizalizaskysaregrey: Liza is a very thoughtful writer and a fan of Rumi Her poems always convey some beautiful messages about life. Her stories depict various relationship issues of life. She is an amazing photographer. She always tries to link her photography with her thoughts.The most common thing between Liza and me is our love for Rumi’s poems and quotes or Rumi’s philosophy.
I’d like to thank Liza and Salma for nominating my blog for this challenge. It invariably, makes me feel good when my fellow bloggers think about my blog for any particular purpose.
Day 3 Quote:
The comparison makes our lives hell. Everybody is talented and everybody has a unique way of living. One needs to find out that talent. But, the problem is we believe more in other’s view than to believe in our own vision. That’s why, comparison snatches the smile of our face. Albert Einstein said well on this comparison.
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein
My Nominations for Day 3:
I would like to nominate these 3 blogs for 3 Days Quote Challenge: